I am so thankful for him and all he is to me and our family.
He is quite a unique and wonderful man.
I want to make his day special, but I do not want to be tempted in the process.
He, unlike me, can eat about 10000 calories per day and not gain an ounce.
He would love a country breakfast, lunch out, dinner out, and a big chocolate peanut-butter mousse cake (his favorite that I make).
I would love all of this too.
However...today marks 3 weeks, so it's measurements and weigh-in day.
Things looked pretty good this morning. My fat pants actually feel a bit loose (whereas they led to a non-breathing state over the holidays), and the scale is down a tiny bit. Looks like about 5 pounds. (This, however, may not last, and usually does not. Scale fluctuations in this house must be affected by the atmosphere, gravity, the cycle of the moon, and who knows what else. I could be up 3 pounds tomorrow morning, regardless.)
Tape measure seems to indicate a total of about 7 inches. I manage to track greater losses by measuring every spot possible, including my ear lobes. The more spots measured, the more possibility of the inches adding up. :-)
So, back to the problem. How do I make Joe's birthday a happy one without making myself fall off the wagon? If we go out, he will say, "Just enjoy it - one meal won't matter." Of course, I will probably just choose not to eat, which I have done many times, and people look at you really funny. I'd rather have NOTHING than to guess-timate calories and be wrong. And I'd rather look weird than gain weight. For me, eating out is not a temptation. I feel rotten when I eat out, so the suffering afterward is never worth the moments of deliciousness.
But that doesn't mean I don't WANT to enjoy it. I love it when someone else cooks the food and serves me. Nice.
And the cake...oh...the cake. I can make a mean cake. No mixes in this house. Homemade chocolate cake - three layers - peanut butter mousse between layers - chocolate ganache poured over the whole thing. Now THAT is something I cannot resist. I'm tempted just writing about it.
The words of my mother echo in the recesses of my mind...
"A moment on the lips, forever on the hips."
"A moment on the lips, forever on the hips."
"A moment on the lips, forever on the hips."
Oh, how true.
And, oh, how mad that makes me!
WHY? OH, WHY, MUST IT BE THIS WAY??????
I thought that writing this down would make today easier, but it has appeared to only bring that chocolate cake to the forefront of my mind, thus making me VERY hungry. Eggs and bacon aren't really sounding that good any more.
Somebody, please help me!!!!!!
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