Saturday, November 19, 2011
Not much change
Not sure if I've hit a wall or not.
Inches are now 35 lost. That's a lot of inches!!!
Pounds are 26.
Fat is 7%.
So...gradual change, but very little.
Didn't hit 30% BF by Halloween.
Just hope I can hit my 30 pound goal for the one year mark, which is Dec. 28.
Loving how I feel wheat-free...and so glad I found ME.
It has changed ME.
Inches are now 35 lost. That's a lot of inches!!!
Pounds are 26.
Fat is 7%.
So...gradual change, but very little.
Didn't hit 30% BF by Halloween.
Just hope I can hit my 30 pound goal for the one year mark, which is Dec. 28.
Loving how I feel wheat-free...and so glad I found ME.
It has changed ME.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Just over 200 days of ME
Well, weight stays the same.
Funny. Fat % keeps creeping down.
I weigh the same I did 2 months ago, but the fat% is down another 1 or 2 %.
Guess that goes to show you that the scale is not the final word.
Still trying to reach 30% body fat by Halloween.
Better watch those delicious, spooky, tempting trick-or-treats!
Funny. Fat % keeps creeping down.
I weigh the same I did 2 months ago, but the fat% is down another 1 or 2 %.
Guess that goes to show you that the scale is not the final word.
Still trying to reach 30% body fat by Halloween.
Better watch those delicious, spooky, tempting trick-or-treats!
Monday, September 12, 2011
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
It's still working!
It's work sometimes, but I feel really great, and IT IS WORKING!!!
Today is Day 171 of ME...that is 24 weeks, or a bit over 5 months.
Down 17 pounds and about 5% body fat.
And...29 inches!!!!
Gave away a whole bunch of clothes the other day. My drawers and closet are nearly empty. I am NOT going back to that weight, ever.
Today is Day 171 of ME...that is 24 weeks, or a bit over 5 months.
Down 17 pounds and about 5% body fat.
And...29 inches!!!!
Gave away a whole bunch of clothes the other day. My drawers and closet are nearly empty. I am NOT going back to that weight, ever.
Friday, July 29, 2011
5-month anniversary with ME...and what a difference it makes!
Well...all I can say is that this is AMAZING.
Only someone who has tried diet after diet, starved 24 hours a day, walked a million miles to nowhere on countless dreadmills, and gained back everything they ever lost can truly appreciate the miracle of a FAT LOSS approach to weight loss.
This being said, just take a look at the numbers.
I have lost 15 pounds since starting ME. This is what the bathroom scale says. BUT...according to the Tanita, I have lost 16 pounds of fat. And fat free mass is only down .2 pound. Putting on muscle, NOT losing muscle, and getting rid of the FAT!!!!
Body fat percentage down 6.6% in 5 months. (My "trunk" measurement is down 8.3% and 10 pounds! Guess I was getting quite a mid-section there for awhile... Oh, the joys of being a female over 40...)
So, for anyone starting out, I do have a few observations about this method. I am certainly not an expert by any means and have much to learn, but I hope this will be helpful to someone:
1. PATIENCE is a must. And scales can be misleading.
When you are bombarded by checkout counter magazines that say "Lose 10 pounds this month!" or "I lost 5 dress sizes!", it is hard to not look at the numbers. You must ditch this diet mentality (and the mentality of our society) that only focuses on "number of pounds lost" and sizes lost. If you are gaining muscle and losing fat, the scale might stay the same...or even go up! Don't be fooled or discouraged by this. Measure as many body parts as you can (both thighs, both calves, both biceps, waist, belly button, upper chest under arms, hips, etc) and WRITE THESE NUMBERS DOWN. Periodically do a remeasure and keep a chart. You will be amazed.
This fat loss approach takes time (unless you are willing to go "all out", which is not sustainable anyway). It is not as quick as muscle loss in a typical low cal diet, excessive cardio approach. There were many times I blogged about how nothing was happening, but I did not give up...and it is working!!!
2. READ, READ, READ.
Read the ME book, Facebook page, blog, forums, ME webpage, jillfit.com, etc. Keep reading. This is not a lazy man's diet (at least in the beginning). For me, it was very critical to learn and understand the "why" of this approach and the "how" it works so that I could make it a success. Education and information are critical and key. The videos, tips, articles, and other information put out by the ME team can make a great deal of difference in how successful you are. And READ THOSE LABELS. Become an expert on what labels say and what you need (and don't need) to eat for fat loss success.
3. Don't get hung up on the exercise. And walk, walk, walk.
It's hard to let go of the old way of thinking. Truly, the ME approach is simple. Unless you are heading down the fitness model or competition route, it does not require hours of your time like other weight loss programs do. If you are near Winston, take advantage of the ME indoor, outdoor, or ab classes at the studio. Buy the ipod routines. Make up your own. You don't need much equipment, and the routines CAN be done with NO equipment. (I recently did a routine outside the front of a hotel that had no gym with just a bench, a large column, and a cushion I took off a chair.)
Do the 20-30 minute routines 2-3 times a week. Walk every day if you can. That's all you need to do. If you want to add some intervals, you can, but you don't have to. Don't make more out of this than you have to. Lift heavy. Move quickly. Push hard. Rest when you have to, but move again as soon as you are able.
4. Remember: It's mostly ALL diet.
When I can't work out or walk, I feel guilty. That's the old me trying to get out. I sincerely HATE working out. There's probably no one who hates it more than I do. I just did it to "lose weight". But...it exercise is not the "secret key". It is diet. Every time you want to eat, remember to be sure it is fat loss friendly. Sticking to the fat loss foods is your best choice in this game. Working out just boosts things along.
5. Sleep. Walk. Relax.
I'm still working on the sleep thing. Can't get it right. It's my next project. I like to stay up late, and in this heat, I'd rather walk at 11pm than go to bed.
Walk when you feel tense, need a break, or just to unwind. It's not a huff-and-puff kind of thing. Just WALK. And enjoy it. Especially if you can find a friend to go along. Or your favorite tunes. Or a gorgeous park or nature trail.
That's it for now. I'm sure there's more I will post later.
For now, I wanted to share my 5 month progress. I still can't believe...
...that I can eat when I'm hungry (or even before I'm hungry),
...that I don't have to spend 90 minutes in the gym 6 days a week,
...that I haven't measured or weighed any food in 5 months,
...that I haven't counted any calories in 5 months,
...that my clothes are all too loose and my pants won't even stay up!
I could do without the shrinking boobs though. :-(
Oh well. It's certainly worth it for what I've lost everywhere else. :-)
Only someone who has tried diet after diet, starved 24 hours a day, walked a million miles to nowhere on countless dreadmills, and gained back everything they ever lost can truly appreciate the miracle of a FAT LOSS approach to weight loss.
This being said, just take a look at the numbers.
I have lost 15 pounds since starting ME. This is what the bathroom scale says. BUT...according to the Tanita, I have lost 16 pounds of fat. And fat free mass is only down .2 pound. Putting on muscle, NOT losing muscle, and getting rid of the FAT!!!!
Body fat percentage down 6.6% in 5 months. (My "trunk" measurement is down 8.3% and 10 pounds! Guess I was getting quite a mid-section there for awhile... Oh, the joys of being a female over 40...)
So, for anyone starting out, I do have a few observations about this method. I am certainly not an expert by any means and have much to learn, but I hope this will be helpful to someone:
1. PATIENCE is a must. And scales can be misleading.
When you are bombarded by checkout counter magazines that say "Lose 10 pounds this month!" or "I lost 5 dress sizes!", it is hard to not look at the numbers. You must ditch this diet mentality (and the mentality of our society) that only focuses on "number of pounds lost" and sizes lost. If you are gaining muscle and losing fat, the scale might stay the same...or even go up! Don't be fooled or discouraged by this. Measure as many body parts as you can (both thighs, both calves, both biceps, waist, belly button, upper chest under arms, hips, etc) and WRITE THESE NUMBERS DOWN. Periodically do a remeasure and keep a chart. You will be amazed.
This fat loss approach takes time (unless you are willing to go "all out", which is not sustainable anyway). It is not as quick as muscle loss in a typical low cal diet, excessive cardio approach. There were many times I blogged about how nothing was happening, but I did not give up...and it is working!!!
2. READ, READ, READ.
Read the ME book, Facebook page, blog, forums, ME webpage, jillfit.com, etc. Keep reading. This is not a lazy man's diet (at least in the beginning). For me, it was very critical to learn and understand the "why" of this approach and the "how" it works so that I could make it a success. Education and information are critical and key. The videos, tips, articles, and other information put out by the ME team can make a great deal of difference in how successful you are. And READ THOSE LABELS. Become an expert on what labels say and what you need (and don't need) to eat for fat loss success.
3. Don't get hung up on the exercise. And walk, walk, walk.
It's hard to let go of the old way of thinking. Truly, the ME approach is simple. Unless you are heading down the fitness model or competition route, it does not require hours of your time like other weight loss programs do. If you are near Winston, take advantage of the ME indoor, outdoor, or ab classes at the studio. Buy the ipod routines. Make up your own. You don't need much equipment, and the routines CAN be done with NO equipment. (I recently did a routine outside the front of a hotel that had no gym with just a bench, a large column, and a cushion I took off a chair.)
Do the 20-30 minute routines 2-3 times a week. Walk every day if you can. That's all you need to do. If you want to add some intervals, you can, but you don't have to. Don't make more out of this than you have to. Lift heavy. Move quickly. Push hard. Rest when you have to, but move again as soon as you are able.
4. Remember: It's mostly ALL diet.
When I can't work out or walk, I feel guilty. That's the old me trying to get out. I sincerely HATE working out. There's probably no one who hates it more than I do. I just did it to "lose weight". But...it exercise is not the "secret key". It is diet. Every time you want to eat, remember to be sure it is fat loss friendly. Sticking to the fat loss foods is your best choice in this game. Working out just boosts things along.
5. Sleep. Walk. Relax.
I'm still working on the sleep thing. Can't get it right. It's my next project. I like to stay up late, and in this heat, I'd rather walk at 11pm than go to bed.
Walk when you feel tense, need a break, or just to unwind. It's not a huff-and-puff kind of thing. Just WALK. And enjoy it. Especially if you can find a friend to go along. Or your favorite tunes. Or a gorgeous park or nature trail.
That's it for now. I'm sure there's more I will post later.
For now, I wanted to share my 5 month progress. I still can't believe...
...that I can eat when I'm hungry (or even before I'm hungry),
...that I don't have to spend 90 minutes in the gym 6 days a week,
...that I haven't measured or weighed any food in 5 months,
...that I haven't counted any calories in 5 months,
...that my clothes are all too loose and my pants won't even stay up!
I could do without the shrinking boobs though. :-(
Oh well. It's certainly worth it for what I've lost everywhere else. :-)
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Just returned from a 10 day trip...and...
I didn't gain an ounce! In fact, I lost another 1.5% of body fat. :-)
Weight is exactly what it was the day we left.
The official numbers are now 24 pounds lost and 27 inches.
I'm actually down 34 pounds from my highest weight in 2007.
I didn't eat everything I wanted to on the trip, but I sure did stuff my face at some of the restaurants.
It's really neat that I can eat a great volume of food when I want to, as long as it's the right foods.
Fat loss is such an interesting concept.
And something I wish I'd discovered long ago!
It is so much better to eat when I am hungry, NOT be hungry all the time, feel more energetic and healthy, and not have indigestion all the time.
I look back at all the other things I tried and can't believe it was this easy all along.
Less time at the gym, faster workouts, more food... how could anyone NOT like this fat loss method???
Weight is exactly what it was the day we left.
The official numbers are now 24 pounds lost and 27 inches.
I'm actually down 34 pounds from my highest weight in 2007.
I didn't eat everything I wanted to on the trip, but I sure did stuff my face at some of the restaurants.
It's really neat that I can eat a great volume of food when I want to, as long as it's the right foods.
Fat loss is such an interesting concept.
And something I wish I'd discovered long ago!
It is so much better to eat when I am hungry, NOT be hungry all the time, feel more energetic and healthy, and not have indigestion all the time.
I look back at all the other things I tried and can't believe it was this easy all along.
Less time at the gym, faster workouts, more food... how could anyone NOT like this fat loss method???
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
114 Days - Nearing 4 Months of ME
Still cruising along. Figure this will be slow and steady, possibly over a year or so. I was used to the "1-2 pounds a week" on low-cal diet concept, so I think, initially, I was expecting this to be a quicker process. But, losing fat and gaining muscle is, I think, a slower process, so I've readjusted my expectations. I do expect to be down to 30% body fat by mid-Fall...possibly to 28% by Christmas. The weight in pounds? I have no idea how to adjust that initial goal. It does not move down much, even though the inches and fat% do. Weird. But cool. I'm down about 22 inches and 19 pounds and 4% body fat.
I'm actually not viewing this as a short-term activity like people tend to view diets. "Lose...reach goal...stop process." Fat loss eating and exercise are a way of living...a continuous process...a lifestyle. I don't like the way I feel when I eat "healthy" (lowfat, high grain, low protein), but I have felt SO MUCH BETTER on the fat-loss way of eating. How could one really go back, once they realize how rotten you feel eating the other way? You really can't beat this approach.
And I'm NOT hungry all the time, which is a MAJOR obstacle overcome. It's work and takes some planning and effort to do this "right", but it is so worth it. I wish I could shout it from the rooftops, but until one realizes this on their own, they just aren't open to the concept. They are really missing out.
I'm actually not viewing this as a short-term activity like people tend to view diets. "Lose...reach goal...stop process." Fat loss eating and exercise are a way of living...a continuous process...a lifestyle. I don't like the way I feel when I eat "healthy" (lowfat, high grain, low protein), but I have felt SO MUCH BETTER on the fat-loss way of eating. How could one really go back, once they realize how rotten you feel eating the other way? You really can't beat this approach.
And I'm NOT hungry all the time, which is a MAJOR obstacle overcome. It's work and takes some planning and effort to do this "right", but it is so worth it. I wish I could shout it from the rooftops, but until one realizes this on their own, they just aren't open to the concept. They are really missing out.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Day 94...Fast approaching 100 days of ME
No change. In fact, weight AND fat up a bit. What gives?
Maybe this is a bump up before a big drop? Hope so.
Only 7 weeks til San Francisco. I will NOT reach my goal by then, as hoped.
Guess my legs will just rub together, and my shorts will bunch up, and I will be crabby about it.
Maybe this is a bump up before a big drop? Hope so.
Only 7 weeks til San Francisco. I will NOT reach my goal by then, as hoped.
Guess my legs will just rub together, and my shorts will bunch up, and I will be crabby about it.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Day 87 of New ME and new "me"
No change on the scale. I could see my old self being very frustrated at this, making sad faces in my food journal, walking around depressed, raiding the chocolate cabinet and figuring "who cares?", etc. BUT...I don't feel that way. The fat percentage continues to go down weekly. I think I'm at a 14 pounds fat loss total so far. I'd rather lose 14 pounds of fat than 14 pounds of muscle, that's for sure! I'm lifting some very heavy weights, so the Fat Free Mass (FFM) is actually going UP. Interesting. A regular scale does not tell you this, nor does it tell you your hydration, which all affect a "weight" reading. I'm so glad I finally know what to look for, what I am looking at, and why the weight number is deceiving.
I still have much to learn. This metabolic approach has been the most "intellectual" approach to weight loss that I've seen, and my curious intellect loves it. I like to know the "why" and 'how" of everything, and, for the first time, I understand why all the stuff I did before didn't work (or either worked for awhile and then stopped working). I was doing everything wrong!!! I was telling my body to store fat. Dummy.
I really wanted some new shorts/pants before our trip in July, but it appears that may not happen. My old shorts are baggy, but not enough so that I can go down a size. All those deadlifts have left me with a muscular bum. Or at least that's the excuse I will use. ;-)
I still have much to learn. This metabolic approach has been the most "intellectual" approach to weight loss that I've seen, and my curious intellect loves it. I like to know the "why" and 'how" of everything, and, for the first time, I understand why all the stuff I did before didn't work (or either worked for awhile and then stopped working). I was doing everything wrong!!! I was telling my body to store fat. Dummy.
I really wanted some new shorts/pants before our trip in July, but it appears that may not happen. My old shorts are baggy, but not enough so that I can go down a size. All those deadlifts have left me with a muscular bum. Or at least that's the excuse I will use. ;-)
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Day 80 of ME
Slow and steady wins the race. I hope. Not much change this week.
Weight is actually UP. But body fat percentage at an all-time low, and both waist and abdomen slightly down today as well.
Having trouble being hungry today. I keep eating. BUT I'm eating the "approved" foods. And, although it's extra "calories", it (hopefully) won't go to "fat" since I'm choosing fat-loss foods. It certainly has to beat eating too much of all the wrong things. Right now, I'm enjoying a delicious bowl of oat bran with vanilla protein powder, cinnamon, apples, and pecans. YUM.
Only 2 months until our family trip, and I really hoped not to be uncomfortable on this trip. I wanted some nice shorts that did NOT ride up in the crotch because my thighs rub together, but not so sure this is going to happen. My legs are just too close together, I guess. It may improve, but I think I'm destined to have rubbing-together-thighs. If you have not experienced this, you really can't relate, but you should thank God every day that you don't have this. It is SO ANNOYING. Sticky when you are hot.....bunching up shorts when you walk... ARRRRGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! You cannot begin to understand.
I also did not want fullback upper arms on this trip. I'd like to wear a sleeveless shirt or dress for the FIRST time since I was 5. I feel so self-conscious about my arms. They don't go down vertically from my shoulder...they sort of round their way down and OUTWARD from shoulder to elbow, like a big curve. Like a FULLBACK. Lifting heavy weights and getting my interval ME workouts in, but so far, no thin arms.
Oh well. Like I said previously, I am NOT giving up. And I am NOT going back to eating the way I used to. I didn't realize how badly I felt most of the time eating that way. Healthy, yes. Fat-loss friendly, no. And feel-good friendly, double no.
So...I continue down the path...
Weight is actually UP. But body fat percentage at an all-time low, and both waist and abdomen slightly down today as well.
Having trouble being hungry today. I keep eating. BUT I'm eating the "approved" foods. And, although it's extra "calories", it (hopefully) won't go to "fat" since I'm choosing fat-loss foods. It certainly has to beat eating too much of all the wrong things. Right now, I'm enjoying a delicious bowl of oat bran with vanilla protein powder, cinnamon, apples, and pecans. YUM.
Only 2 months until our family trip, and I really hoped not to be uncomfortable on this trip. I wanted some nice shorts that did NOT ride up in the crotch because my thighs rub together, but not so sure this is going to happen. My legs are just too close together, I guess. It may improve, but I think I'm destined to have rubbing-together-thighs. If you have not experienced this, you really can't relate, but you should thank God every day that you don't have this. It is SO ANNOYING. Sticky when you are hot.....bunching up shorts when you walk... ARRRRGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! You cannot begin to understand.
I also did not want fullback upper arms on this trip. I'd like to wear a sleeveless shirt or dress for the FIRST time since I was 5. I feel so self-conscious about my arms. They don't go down vertically from my shoulder...they sort of round their way down and OUTWARD from shoulder to elbow, like a big curve. Like a FULLBACK. Lifting heavy weights and getting my interval ME workouts in, but so far, no thin arms.
Oh well. Like I said previously, I am NOT giving up. And I am NOT going back to eating the way I used to. I didn't realize how badly I felt most of the time eating that way. Healthy, yes. Fat-loss friendly, no. And feel-good friendly, double no.
So...I continue down the path...
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Day 74. 10 1/2 weeks of Fat Loss Lifestyle
I think I'm going to stick with this forever. I can't see going back to the old way.
It's amazing how "bad carbs" make me feel. Cloudy, sleepy, fuzzy, blah, non-energetic. Who wants to live like that??? I love the way they taste, but not the way they make me feel. They are not worth it.
No change on the scale this week. Hips a tad smaller, but I do mean "tad".
I hope to see continual downward movement of the weight and fat percentage on the scale, and hope to see inches melting, slowly but surely.
It appears that this is a new life for me. Once I've done this and see its effects...how can I go back to counting calories, points, fat grams, etc. Weighing every bite? Going to bed so hungry that I can't sleep? Why would I want a life like that?
So...here I go down the new road. I hope I don't lose my way.
It's amazing how "bad carbs" make me feel. Cloudy, sleepy, fuzzy, blah, non-energetic. Who wants to live like that??? I love the way they taste, but not the way they make me feel. They are not worth it.
No change on the scale this week. Hips a tad smaller, but I do mean "tad".
I hope to see continual downward movement of the weight and fat percentage on the scale, and hope to see inches melting, slowly but surely.
It appears that this is a new life for me. Once I've done this and see its effects...how can I go back to counting calories, points, fat grams, etc. Weighing every bite? Going to bed so hungry that I can't sleep? Why would I want a life like that?
So...here I go down the new road. I hope I don't lose my way.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Day 67...almost 10 weeks of ME Fat Loss Approach
Not quite the full 10 weeks, but close enough to make an assessment.
The (almost) 10 week results appear to be as follows:
-10 inches lost
-10 pounds lost
-fat percentage down 2.5%
-"fat pounds" down from 69 pounds of fat to 61 pounds of fat (so 8 pounds of fat loss)
-muscle mass weight down about 1 pound :-(
My measurements are what they were when I weighed even less in the summer of 2008, so I must've lost too much muscle weight back then. I have to work really hard to keep that muscle on.
I am not really hungry. When I am, I eat. :-)
I am allowed cheat meals (1 a week), but I've only had about 4 in the 10 weeks. I find myself not wanting it, believe it or not.
I really miss rolls and butter, chocolate to excess, chicken-n-dumplings, and that's about it.
I can have chocolate, but not as much as I'd like to have.
Other than that, I am good with this plan.
I commit to 10 more weeks. The workouts are short, but brutal, and I hate them. The walking is not so bad. I like to walk; it's just hard to find time (and the right weather) to do it. I just despise the treadmill. The food is good. It's still hard for me to plan ahead and "nip in the bud" any interruptions, potential derailings, etc. I really do have to PLAN ahead for each and every day, thinking about where I will be, what I will eat, what exercise I will do, what items I need from the grocery store, etc. I am NOT a planner because our life here in this house is NOT ever the same from day to day, so this is the hardest part. I will have to get better. Last night, I ate a big salad at 10 pm for dinner. Everyone else ate pizza earlier, but I didn't. I think that has happened nearly every day this week. I make dinner, and everyone eats it while I watch. It is sad. But it is the way it must be.
I want to feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't want to see "rolls" on myself. I don't want my thighs to rub together when I walk so my shorts ride up (I really hate that). I want clothes to "fit" and look nice, not to tug, pull, and stretch. Is this too much to ask?
The (almost) 10 week results appear to be as follows:
-10 inches lost
-10 pounds lost
-fat percentage down 2.5%
-"fat pounds" down from 69 pounds of fat to 61 pounds of fat (so 8 pounds of fat loss)
-muscle mass weight down about 1 pound :-(
My measurements are what they were when I weighed even less in the summer of 2008, so I must've lost too much muscle weight back then. I have to work really hard to keep that muscle on.
I am not really hungry. When I am, I eat. :-)
I am allowed cheat meals (1 a week), but I've only had about 4 in the 10 weeks. I find myself not wanting it, believe it or not.
I really miss rolls and butter, chocolate to excess, chicken-n-dumplings, and that's about it.
I can have chocolate, but not as much as I'd like to have.
Other than that, I am good with this plan.
I commit to 10 more weeks. The workouts are short, but brutal, and I hate them. The walking is not so bad. I like to walk; it's just hard to find time (and the right weather) to do it. I just despise the treadmill. The food is good. It's still hard for me to plan ahead and "nip in the bud" any interruptions, potential derailings, etc. I really do have to PLAN ahead for each and every day, thinking about where I will be, what I will eat, what exercise I will do, what items I need from the grocery store, etc. I am NOT a planner because our life here in this house is NOT ever the same from day to day, so this is the hardest part. I will have to get better. Last night, I ate a big salad at 10 pm for dinner. Everyone else ate pizza earlier, but I didn't. I think that has happened nearly every day this week. I make dinner, and everyone eats it while I watch. It is sad. But it is the way it must be.
I want to feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't want to see "rolls" on myself. I don't want my thighs to rub together when I walk so my shorts ride up (I really hate that). I want clothes to "fit" and look nice, not to tug, pull, and stretch. Is this too much to ask?
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Day 60
Thinking about my last 4 or 5 posts and what I said...
I sound like I don't believe myself. And I guess I don't. It really takes a LOT of hard work to convince yourself you don't believe something you've believed for 25 years.
Calories aren't everything? More exercise = more weight loss? Longer cardio = more fat burned?
Sounds strange to me.
I sure hope this works for me. I don't have another alternative. I said I am NOT going back to counting calories or fat grams, and I WILL NOT. I am sure of this. I am just still unsure of how this whole ME approach works for me. It is different for everyone because everyone is different. I have to be so in tune with how I feel, how my body reacts, what foods do to me...this is SO DIFFICULT for me.
So, I will keep writing the same thing every week until I believe it. Or my body actually proves that it works. Then I will believe.
I sound like I don't believe myself. And I guess I don't. It really takes a LOT of hard work to convince yourself you don't believe something you've believed for 25 years.
Calories aren't everything? More exercise = more weight loss? Longer cardio = more fat burned?
Sounds strange to me.
I sure hope this works for me. I don't have another alternative. I said I am NOT going back to counting calories or fat grams, and I WILL NOT. I am sure of this. I am just still unsure of how this whole ME approach works for me. It is different for everyone because everyone is different. I have to be so in tune with how I feel, how my body reacts, what foods do to me...this is SO DIFFICULT for me.
So, I will keep writing the same thing every week until I believe it. Or my body actually proves that it works. Then I will believe.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Day 59...just over 8 weeks
Well...measurements still about the same. Weight still about the same.
Yesterday's email encouragement was about weight loss vs. fat loss. Society expects large numbers of pounds lost, so I am supposed to re-adjust my mindset. It's not about pounds. So, my goal of 150 pounds may never be met. Fat loss and heavy weight lifting will result in fat loss, not muscle loss. Fat weighs less than muscle, so the scale will not reflect the truth.
According to the fat calculations, fat loss is at just over 6 pounds in 8 weeks.
I have to stay focused on this. I feel better and do not have to count every calorie...and I"m not starving.
No diet or weight loss program has ever done this for me. I have to believe what the ME experts are saying and change 30 years of thinking wrongly about weight loss. The scale is not my friend. Pounds are not going to tell the facts. Only fat loss, which is down from just over 41% on January 1 to around 38%. And, evening readings (which are supposed to be more accurate) have made a decline in just a few weeks from 38% to 35%. Progress!!!
Not the progress I expected or planned...so I have to change my "goal" from 150 pounds to something else. Maybe a size 10 or 12??? Not sure yet.
Yesterday's email encouragement was about weight loss vs. fat loss. Society expects large numbers of pounds lost, so I am supposed to re-adjust my mindset. It's not about pounds. So, my goal of 150 pounds may never be met. Fat loss and heavy weight lifting will result in fat loss, not muscle loss. Fat weighs less than muscle, so the scale will not reflect the truth.
According to the fat calculations, fat loss is at just over 6 pounds in 8 weeks.
I have to stay focused on this. I feel better and do not have to count every calorie...and I"m not starving.
No diet or weight loss program has ever done this for me. I have to believe what the ME experts are saying and change 30 years of thinking wrongly about weight loss. The scale is not my friend. Pounds are not going to tell the facts. Only fat loss, which is down from just over 41% on January 1 to around 38%. And, evening readings (which are supposed to be more accurate) have made a decline in just a few weeks from 38% to 35%. Progress!!!
Not the progress I expected or planned...so I have to change my "goal" from 150 pounds to something else. Maybe a size 10 or 12??? Not sure yet.
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Day 52 - In week 8 of ME
Not much change. In a way, I'm surprised.
I really expected a time of "adjustment", followed by my body's realizing it was time to change and a steady progress downward in weight, inches, and body fat. Alas, not the case. The last 3 weeks have been completely the same. Inches have not budged in ANY spots AT ALL. Weight is only down about 1 pound per week.
I WILL FINISH at least 10 weeks. I may even give it a bit longer because I do feel better, have more energy, and am not hungry all the time. Unfortunately, this plan is one of those where I really have to pay attention to how different foods make me feel and how they affect me. I have always been VERY out of tune with that. I'm hungry most of the time, and that's it. I don't know that caffeine does this to me, or that sugar does that to me, or that carbs make me gain weight, or whatever. I just know that FOOD makes me gain weight...and not much food at that!
They really want me to focus on how I feel - hunger, energy, and cravings. This is SO HARD for me!!! I don't have time to do much of anything "fun" or pay attention to me. My days are whirlwinds of activity and always feeling "behind" on just about everything. I go to bed each night feeling guilty about what I forgot to do or didn't get to today. I don't watch TV at all...I don't have a hobby... I'm not used to paying attention to such seemingly minor details like "how so-and-so" food makes me hungry or gives/takes energy. Who knows??? I don't. I'm trying, but this is just very difficult.
I don't see what other choice I have. I am NOT going back to counting calories, fat grams, or points. NOT EVER. I am NOT going to weigh 192 again either. NOT EVER.
I really have to learn to focus on my own body's reactions to various things and buckle down on all aspects of this fat loss approach to life. I am doing much of what they advise and sticking to the food and exercise plan. The problem is in managing the emotional part of the formula, which the creators of the plan say is of utmost importance. Sleep, stress management, scheduling of meals/workouts/walks/downtime, etc. are a critical part of this plan, but I have been neglecting it.
Typing estimates at midnight (and blogs at 12:30am) is not good. But, it is normal life for me. Joe comes home from the gym at 9pm...then it's showers, nighttime rituals, needy kids, and THEN work. It has to be done or we don't get work. So...I will have to re-think this, but not sure what my options are.
I am going to try harder. Have upped the ME Spark Workouts to 3X/week from 2X/week and have really moved up in weights. Deadlifting 50 pounds, squatting and curling 40 pounds, etc. They insist that HEAVY WEIGHTS = SMALLER ME. We shall see....
I really expected a time of "adjustment", followed by my body's realizing it was time to change and a steady progress downward in weight, inches, and body fat. Alas, not the case. The last 3 weeks have been completely the same. Inches have not budged in ANY spots AT ALL. Weight is only down about 1 pound per week.
I WILL FINISH at least 10 weeks. I may even give it a bit longer because I do feel better, have more energy, and am not hungry all the time. Unfortunately, this plan is one of those where I really have to pay attention to how different foods make me feel and how they affect me. I have always been VERY out of tune with that. I'm hungry most of the time, and that's it. I don't know that caffeine does this to me, or that sugar does that to me, or that carbs make me gain weight, or whatever. I just know that FOOD makes me gain weight...and not much food at that!
They really want me to focus on how I feel - hunger, energy, and cravings. This is SO HARD for me!!! I don't have time to do much of anything "fun" or pay attention to me. My days are whirlwinds of activity and always feeling "behind" on just about everything. I go to bed each night feeling guilty about what I forgot to do or didn't get to today. I don't watch TV at all...I don't have a hobby... I'm not used to paying attention to such seemingly minor details like "how so-and-so" food makes me hungry or gives/takes energy. Who knows??? I don't. I'm trying, but this is just very difficult.
I don't see what other choice I have. I am NOT going back to counting calories, fat grams, or points. NOT EVER. I am NOT going to weigh 192 again either. NOT EVER.
I really have to learn to focus on my own body's reactions to various things and buckle down on all aspects of this fat loss approach to life. I am doing much of what they advise and sticking to the food and exercise plan. The problem is in managing the emotional part of the formula, which the creators of the plan say is of utmost importance. Sleep, stress management, scheduling of meals/workouts/walks/downtime, etc. are a critical part of this plan, but I have been neglecting it.
Typing estimates at midnight (and blogs at 12:30am) is not good. But, it is normal life for me. Joe comes home from the gym at 9pm...then it's showers, nighttime rituals, needy kids, and THEN work. It has to be done or we don't get work. So...I will have to re-think this, but not sure what my options are.
I am going to try harder. Have upped the ME Spark Workouts to 3X/week from 2X/week and have really moved up in weights. Deadlifting 50 pounds, squatting and curling 40 pounds, etc. They insist that HEAVY WEIGHTS = SMALLER ME. We shall see....
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
ME - Day 45
Well...day 45. Just over 6 weeks of this plan.
Scale SLOWLY moving down - about 6 pounds total, so that's only a pound a week.
Tape measure not really cooperating either. Pretty much the same measures for the past
few weeks. Fat loss is supposed to be the main thing to watch, but I didn't realize it's supposed to be an EVENING measure, not morning. I'd been doing it in the morning since Jan. 1. It was almost 41% then. BUT...never checked in the evening, so I don't know what it was then. Since week 4 of the ME plan, I've checked at night, so I don't have much to compare over time. Evening measures are around 36%.
I will need a few more weeks to see if there is a downward trend. Overall, I feel better, have more energy, and am not nearly as hungry and obsessed with food. I can eat when I need to, which is NICE.
Only time will tell.
Scale SLOWLY moving down - about 6 pounds total, so that's only a pound a week.
Tape measure not really cooperating either. Pretty much the same measures for the past
few weeks. Fat loss is supposed to be the main thing to watch, but I didn't realize it's supposed to be an EVENING measure, not morning. I'd been doing it in the morning since Jan. 1. It was almost 41% then. BUT...never checked in the evening, so I don't know what it was then. Since week 4 of the ME plan, I've checked at night, so I don't have much to compare over time. Evening measures are around 36%.
I will need a few more weeks to see if there is a downward trend. Overall, I feel better, have more energy, and am not nearly as hungry and obsessed with food. I can eat when I need to, which is NICE.
Only time will tell.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Day 38 of ME
Well...no change on scale or tape measure. :-(
Kind of surprised. BUT...I am giving it the full 10 weeks.
Metabolic Effect posted winners and runners up of the 10 week challenge yesterday, and the photos were impressive. Just 10 weeks. I can do this.
Fat loss is more important than weight loss.
I am really going to have to change the ingrained idea that the scale tells all.
My weight is the same, but my fat percentage is down lower than it ever was, even when I was 10 pounds lighter a few years ago.
% is down about 1.5% from last week and nearly 5% from when I started.
REFOCUS: Fat loss is more important than weight loss. This approach is very different from all others I've done and is healthier, more doable, doesn't leave me starving, and targets FAT, not muscle. As I get older, muscle loss is not an option. I must preserve that, and other diets do not help with this. I must change my thinking on the number on the scale.
Joe says my butt is smaller, and he usually doesn't notice, so I'll be happy with this for now. :-)
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Day 31 of ME
Still going strong. Not hungry like I always am on diets. Lots of energy.
Weight up 1 pound, but they encourage you not to look at this number.
Inches down another 1 1/2 total, so this is the right direction.
AND....I took my shorts out that I could not wear last summer...and they are LOOSE!!!
YAY!!!
Total of 17 inches lost. I don't want to see those inches again.
It will be hard not to follow the number on the scale, esp. since I set a weight goal initially.
Not sure how to adjust this to have some kind of goal.
Maybe fat percentage should be about 30%?
10 weeks total, and we will re-assess goals, progress, and whether or not this will work for me.
6 weeks to go.
Weight up 1 pound, but they encourage you not to look at this number.
Inches down another 1 1/2 total, so this is the right direction.
AND....I took my shorts out that I could not wear last summer...and they are LOOSE!!!
YAY!!!
Total of 17 inches lost. I don't want to see those inches again.
It will be hard not to follow the number on the scale, esp. since I set a weight goal initially.
Not sure how to adjust this to have some kind of goal.
Maybe fat percentage should be about 30%?
10 weeks total, and we will re-assess goals, progress, and whether or not this will work for me.
6 weeks to go.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Day 24 - Still kicking!
Day 24 of ME.
Still liking it. I think cravings have truly subsided. I wouldn't have believed it had it not been happening to me. I had heard of this phenomenon, but did NOT believe it for a minute. Chocolate is still on the top of the list, and cravings for that continue, but other things seems to have diminished. How does that happen?
Weight down another 2-3 pounds... total inches at 16.
Supposed to be FAT loss, not weight loss, so if the scale doesn't cooperate, but the fat percentage and tape measure do, I won't be concerned.
Feeling very good. More alert, less lethargic, less obsessing about food.
I still can't imagine that NOT counting calories might actually work, but I'm still in the 10 week trial period, and I will wait until then to make my formal assessment of the program.
So...that will be around May 2. This day will "tell all".
Still liking it. I think cravings have truly subsided. I wouldn't have believed it had it not been happening to me. I had heard of this phenomenon, but did NOT believe it for a minute. Chocolate is still on the top of the list, and cravings for that continue, but other things seems to have diminished. How does that happen?
Weight down another 2-3 pounds... total inches at 16.
Supposed to be FAT loss, not weight loss, so if the scale doesn't cooperate, but the fat percentage and tape measure do, I won't be concerned.
Feeling very good. More alert, less lethargic, less obsessing about food.
I still can't imagine that NOT counting calories might actually work, but I'm still in the 10 week trial period, and I will wait until then to make my formal assessment of the program.
So...that will be around May 2. This day will "tell all".
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Day 17 of ME
So far, still very doable.
Much better than starving to death all the time and counting every blasted calorie.
I like it...so far.
We shall see how this goes.
Down about 3 pounds in 2 weeks on the plan...plus 5 more inches.
Eating for "fat loss" is a very interesting concept, unlike most other diet approaches.
Fat always remains, even when I lose weight, so I'm really hoping this is the way out of that rut.
Sick of lumps and bumps and rolls. A fat loss (as opposed to weight loss) approach should solve that.
Much better than starving to death all the time and counting every blasted calorie.
I like it...so far.
We shall see how this goes.
Down about 3 pounds in 2 weeks on the plan...plus 5 more inches.
Eating for "fat loss" is a very interesting concept, unlike most other diet approaches.
Fat always remains, even when I lose weight, so I'm really hoping this is the way out of that rut.
Sick of lumps and bumps and rolls. A fat loss (as opposed to weight loss) approach should solve that.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Day 11 of New Plan
As I look back at all my diet notes and woes, I realize that the same problem always comes up.
I am starving, eating even less, unable to function, sick of counting and measuring and depriving myself...and watching the scale sit still or even go up.
I realized then that the "same old, same old" is NOT going to work. Count calories. Count points. Count carbs. Count fat. Count whatever....it DOESN'T WORK. Something is missing in the approach. Something is not right and is not going to work, especially as I get older.
So, I changed gears. Trying something VERY different. Out of the norm of any other things I've tried.
So far, I am still alive. And, I haven't actually been very hungry. (THAT part alone is a miracle, since I am always hungry, usually even before I get up from the table...) And I've felt pretty good too. That is nice. And, when I am hungry, I can actually EAT.
I think I am down about 2-3 pounds in 11 days. Hopefully the trend will continue.
I can certainly "do" this eating approach much more easily than I was able to tolerate starving to death all the time. It is healthy, workable, palatable, nutritious, and has the ultimate goal of FAT loss, not WEIGHT loss. Weight is an issue, but FAT is more so a problem. I am tired of looking at my big tummy, lumpy hips, etc. that were not always there. And, with diligence and perseverance, I hope to kiss them goodbye.
I am starving, eating even less, unable to function, sick of counting and measuring and depriving myself...and watching the scale sit still or even go up.
I realized then that the "same old, same old" is NOT going to work. Count calories. Count points. Count carbs. Count fat. Count whatever....it DOESN'T WORK. Something is missing in the approach. Something is not right and is not going to work, especially as I get older.
So, I changed gears. Trying something VERY different. Out of the norm of any other things I've tried.
So far, I am still alive. And, I haven't actually been very hungry. (THAT part alone is a miracle, since I am always hungry, usually even before I get up from the table...) And I've felt pretty good too. That is nice. And, when I am hungry, I can actually EAT.
I think I am down about 2-3 pounds in 11 days. Hopefully the trend will continue.
I can certainly "do" this eating approach much more easily than I was able to tolerate starving to death all the time. It is healthy, workable, palatable, nutritious, and has the ultimate goal of FAT loss, not WEIGHT loss. Weight is an issue, but FAT is more so a problem. I am tired of looking at my big tummy, lumpy hips, etc. that were not always there. And, with diligence and perseverance, I hope to kiss them goodbye.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
New View?
Well, I'm completely changing gears.
No calorie counting. No measuring or weighing food.
Reading labels. Only certain foods permitted. Others foods not permitted.
Lots of protein. Little carbs.
Interval training with weights - a new approach.
Almost 3 days down. Not too bad...so far.
Weight unchanged, but at least not up.
We shall see what it does after one week on this plan.
My goal is to try it for 4 weeks to see what happens.
Right now, I'm off to walk!
No calorie counting. No measuring or weighing food.
Reading labels. Only certain foods permitted. Others foods not permitted.
Lots of protein. Little carbs.
Interval training with weights - a new approach.
Almost 3 days down. Not too bad...so far.
Weight unchanged, but at least not up.
We shall see what it does after one week on this plan.
My goal is to try it for 4 weeks to see what happens.
Right now, I'm off to walk!
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Nothing to Say
Up 3 pounds.
Hard work does NOT pay off.
Will rethink and re-evaluate.
Too much to do to focus on exercise - haven't done a thing in 4 days.
I think I wear too many hats. Can't get it all done, and "me" is always last on the list.
So, the diet and exercise get pushed off the plate when other things are pressing.
Hard work does NOT pay off.
Will rethink and re-evaluate.
Too much to do to focus on exercise - haven't done a thing in 4 days.
I think I wear too many hats. Can't get it all done, and "me" is always last on the list.
So, the diet and exercise get pushed off the plate when other things are pressing.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
HUNGER
Very hungry day today. There are those days that are just like that. Why, I don't know.
Went for a walk to try to convince myself it's not hunger, but it's still there.
Hard to even concentrate with all that hollow feeling in my mid-section. UGH.
Have tackled the playroom organization, the guest room organization, the consignment project...
guess I'll hit the office next. Gotta stay busy....
Summer is coming, and I WILL NOT BE FAT. I will enjoy my shorts and I will be COMFORTABLE,
for the first time in a long time.
Went for a walk to try to convince myself it's not hunger, but it's still there.
Hard to even concentrate with all that hollow feeling in my mid-section. UGH.
Have tackled the playroom organization, the guest room organization, the consignment project...
guess I'll hit the office next. Gotta stay busy....
Summer is coming, and I WILL NOT BE FAT. I will enjoy my shorts and I will be COMFORTABLE,
for the first time in a long time.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Disappointment Grows
Since Wednesday's weigh-in, I have managed to slowly creep on 2 pounds. Shouldn't loss CONTINUE or at least stay stable? Going up???? What in the world is going on???????
I just don't get it.
Sticking to the diet. Measuring food. Weighing food. Journaling food intake. Drinking water. Cardio AND weights. Lots of veggies. Where is the error in this?
I am VERY hungry much of the day, sometimes to the point of distraction. I literally cannot focus due to the hollow, empty feeling I have in my entire mid-section.
I don't know what to do. I haven't given up, but I am very confused and frustrated.
According to the "math" (of 3500 calories = 1 pound), I should be down a minimum of 10 pounds at this point, if not more. My body is immune to weight loss in some strange, unknown way. Today, I am down 5 pounds, at best. If that.
I have a VERY LONG WAY TO GO. I saw my butt in the mirror today. It looks like it belongs to several other people (combined).
I am going for a walk. Not that it helps.
I just don't get it.
Sticking to the diet. Measuring food. Weighing food. Journaling food intake. Drinking water. Cardio AND weights. Lots of veggies. Where is the error in this?
I am VERY hungry much of the day, sometimes to the point of distraction. I literally cannot focus due to the hollow, empty feeling I have in my entire mid-section.
I don't know what to do. I haven't given up, but I am very confused and frustrated.
According to the "math" (of 3500 calories = 1 pound), I should be down a minimum of 10 pounds at this point, if not more. My body is immune to weight loss in some strange, unknown way. Today, I am down 5 pounds, at best. If that.
I have a VERY LONG WAY TO GO. I saw my butt in the mirror today. It looks like it belongs to several other people (combined).
I am going for a walk. Not that it helps.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Weekly Weigh-in and Measure-in
I must admit I'm disappointed. I wish I had the outlook that something is better than nothing...that any loss is better than a gain - but...I don't.
As hard as I am working and as deprived as I continue to feel, I expected to see more, either in the measurements or the scale...or BOTH.
Only down .4 pound from last week (YES, that is a DECIMAL in front of the 4!).
And only down 1 3/4 inches. Considering that I measure 12 different spots, I'd expect this to be more.
This is discouraging to me.
If I am dieting and exercising, I expect more results.
If I am SO SORE from doing things I'm not even supposed to do exercise-wise, I want better results.
If I am turning down every treat, making a separate dinner for myself, and drinking half a gallon of water EVERY day, I need better results.
Someone, please save me from this eternal cycle of misery in which I find myself!
Why can't I just be one of those naturally thin people who finds food an inconvenience????
As hard as I am working and as deprived as I continue to feel, I expected to see more, either in the measurements or the scale...or BOTH.
Only down .4 pound from last week (YES, that is a DECIMAL in front of the 4!).
And only down 1 3/4 inches. Considering that I measure 12 different spots, I'd expect this to be more.
This is discouraging to me.
If I am dieting and exercising, I expect more results.
If I am SO SORE from doing things I'm not even supposed to do exercise-wise, I want better results.
If I am turning down every treat, making a separate dinner for myself, and drinking half a gallon of water EVERY day, I need better results.
Someone, please save me from this eternal cycle of misery in which I find myself!
Why can't I just be one of those naturally thin people who finds food an inconvenience????
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Another Gripe (sorry...)
I am growing weary of fixing two meals every night.
One that I would LIKE to have, but for my family.
One for me that has 3 calories.
It is so hard to prep, cook, smell, and see the meals, not to mention having to watch everyone else enjoy them. Grrrrrrrrrrr.......
I think I know now why I gain weight. It has become very clear.
I am NOT a big eater, but I am a nibbler.
Fixing appropriate, nutritious meals with counted calories takes work and time.
I am often not afforded such time. Therefore, I grab food here and there when I can.
Things you can just "grab" tend not to be the lowest in calories, I fear.
But I am sure now that this is why I continue to gain. Unless I can find time every day to prepare, measure, count, cook, research, etc. a proper meal, I just grab and go. And grab and go = pounds.
:-(
One that I would LIKE to have, but for my family.
One for me that has 3 calories.
It is so hard to prep, cook, smell, and see the meals, not to mention having to watch everyone else enjoy them. Grrrrrrrrrrr.......
I think I know now why I gain weight. It has become very clear.
I am NOT a big eater, but I am a nibbler.
Fixing appropriate, nutritious meals with counted calories takes work and time.
I am often not afforded such time. Therefore, I grab food here and there when I can.
Things you can just "grab" tend not to be the lowest in calories, I fear.
But I am sure now that this is why I continue to gain. Unless I can find time every day to prepare, measure, count, cook, research, etc. a proper meal, I just grab and go. And grab and go = pounds.
:-(
Broken Scale
Scale up .5 pound for 3 days in a row, so I was sure it would be back down today.
No way.
Instead, it's up another whole pound, on top of the .5 pound. UNBELIEVEABLE.
This is what happens every time I diet/exercise. Rolling along...no record-breaking weight loss...
but at least some minor progress...then BAM! It either stops or goes back up.
I can't eat any less. No way.
And I can't exercise more. Already spending too much time doing that when I have other pressing
issues to attend to.
What's left? Liposuction? Amputation?
No way.
Instead, it's up another whole pound, on top of the .5 pound. UNBELIEVEABLE.
This is what happens every time I diet/exercise. Rolling along...no record-breaking weight loss...
but at least some minor progress...then BAM! It either stops or goes back up.
I can't eat any less. No way.
And I can't exercise more. Already spending too much time doing that when I have other pressing
issues to attend to.
What's left? Liposuction? Amputation?
Friday, January 28, 2011
VERY ANGRY!!!!
The scale keeps going up.
I am very frustrated.
As hard as I've been working (diet and exercise both), more should be happening.
I need to amputate some large fatty parts of my body.
That should knock off about 10-20 pounds.
I am very frustrated.
As hard as I've been working (diet and exercise both), more should be happening.
I need to amputate some large fatty parts of my body.
That should knock off about 10-20 pounds.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Scales are the Enemy
The scale was down 3 days in a row, and I thought this meant a break-through...
but it was back up today.
I'm surprised at how the inches don't seem to really be moving either.
My tummy certainly FEELS flatter.
I will NOT have my thighs rubbing together this summer, and that's final!!!!!
I WILL DO THIS!!!!
but it was back up today.
I'm surprised at how the inches don't seem to really be moving either.
My tummy certainly FEELS flatter.
I will NOT have my thighs rubbing together this summer, and that's final!!!!!
I WILL DO THIS!!!!
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Nervous
Tomorrow is my weigh-in and measurement day.
This marks 4 weeks.
I am anxious and nervous.
Funny how I am intimidated by a scale and tape measure.
Numbers are everything.
This marks 4 weeks.
I am anxious and nervous.
Funny how I am intimidated by a scale and tape measure.
Numbers are everything.
Needing Accountability
No one really checks up on me.
Are you sticking with it?
Do you need an encouraging word?
Would you like a walking partner?
You look like you are losing weight. Keep up the great work!
I'm in a lonely battle all by my lonesome.
Each day I wake up, and my first thought is "another day of starving...will I make it?"
I'm the only one who can decide if I will raid the potato chips or chocolate bags...or if I will stick to the half gallon of water and very little food. When I look at my food log at the end of the day, I'm still surprised how little food is listed. I can't believe how fast it adds up.
It's all up to me. Every minute of every day, whether I will choose wisely or poorly.
I feel like the knight in the third Indiana Jones movie is standing in the kitchen waiting to say, "You have chosen poorly" or "you have chosen wisely".
I wonder if every choice is going to cause me to fall off the wagon, gain a pound, push me over the edge, or cause me to be even hungrier in the next hour.
I wish I didn't have to constantly focus on this.
How many calories do I have left?
If I eat this, will I have enough food later?
Do I really want this or that?
What is the best way to budget my food today?
How many glasses of water do I have left to force down?
There is nothing to look forward to. I ENJOY good food. And now I don't get to.
Yes, I am done griping. And off to drink more water. Bleh.
Are you sticking with it?
Do you need an encouraging word?
Would you like a walking partner?
You look like you are losing weight. Keep up the great work!
I'm in a lonely battle all by my lonesome.
Each day I wake up, and my first thought is "another day of starving...will I make it?"
I'm the only one who can decide if I will raid the potato chips or chocolate bags...or if I will stick to the half gallon of water and very little food. When I look at my food log at the end of the day, I'm still surprised how little food is listed. I can't believe how fast it adds up.
It's all up to me. Every minute of every day, whether I will choose wisely or poorly.
I feel like the knight in the third Indiana Jones movie is standing in the kitchen waiting to say, "You have chosen poorly" or "you have chosen wisely".
I wonder if every choice is going to cause me to fall off the wagon, gain a pound, push me over the edge, or cause me to be even hungrier in the next hour.
I wish I didn't have to constantly focus on this.
How many calories do I have left?
If I eat this, will I have enough food later?
Do I really want this or that?
What is the best way to budget my food today?
How many glasses of water do I have left to force down?
There is nothing to look forward to. I ENJOY good food. And now I don't get to.
Yes, I am done griping. And off to drink more water. Bleh.
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Dieting is Overrated
Complaint time. Sorry.
My children (and husband) got Chick-fil-a tonight. This is the THIRD time in 3 weeks I've had to sit in a closed-up van (it IS 36 degrees out, you know) with the wonderful smells of chicken strips and french fries wafting through the air. Then they got THREE large peppermint chocolate chip milkshakes. "Do you want some?" they keep asking. YES!!!! I want. NO!!!!! I can't.
NOT FAIR.
Why couldn't I be one of those people who can eat what they want to and not have to worry?
Always have to say "no" when I don't want to.
Never a point in my life where I could eat what I wanted. Well, maybe when I was 2 months old.
It is my dream to not have to worry about "a moment on the lips, forever on the hips". Forever? That got that right. I can't get anything off my hips that was once on my lips.
My children (and husband) got Chick-fil-a tonight. This is the THIRD time in 3 weeks I've had to sit in a closed-up van (it IS 36 degrees out, you know) with the wonderful smells of chicken strips and french fries wafting through the air. Then they got THREE large peppermint chocolate chip milkshakes. "Do you want some?" they keep asking. YES!!!! I want. NO!!!!! I can't.
NOT FAIR.
Why couldn't I be one of those people who can eat what they want to and not have to worry?
Always have to say "no" when I don't want to.
Never a point in my life where I could eat what I wanted. Well, maybe when I was 2 months old.
It is my dream to not have to worry about "a moment on the lips, forever on the hips". Forever? That got that right. I can't get anything off my hips that was once on my lips.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
The Wagon
is still rolling down the road, and I am still on board!
The cake looked WONDERFUL....3 layers of chocolate cake with peanut butter mousse between each layer...chocolate ganache on top and running down the sides.
But I only ate a bite or two.
And now I'm heading out on another nordic walk.
Chew, chew, chew....this gum, gum, gum.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Dreading Today - How Will I Make It Through?
Today is my husband's birthday.
I am so thankful for him and all he is to me and our family.
He is quite a unique and wonderful man.
I want to make his day special, but I do not want to be tempted in the process.
He, unlike me, can eat about 10000 calories per day and not gain an ounce.
He would love a country breakfast, lunch out, dinner out, and a big chocolate peanut-butter mousse cake (his favorite that I make).
I would love all of this too.
However...today marks 3 weeks, so it's measurements and weigh-in day.
Things looked pretty good this morning. My fat pants actually feel a bit loose (whereas they led to a non-breathing state over the holidays), and the scale is down a tiny bit. Looks like about 5 pounds. (This, however, may not last, and usually does not. Scale fluctuations in this house must be affected by the atmosphere, gravity, the cycle of the moon, and who knows what else. I could be up 3 pounds tomorrow morning, regardless.)
Tape measure seems to indicate a total of about 7 inches. I manage to track greater losses by measuring every spot possible, including my ear lobes. The more spots measured, the more possibility of the inches adding up. :-)
So, back to the problem. How do I make Joe's birthday a happy one without making myself fall off the wagon? If we go out, he will say, "Just enjoy it - one meal won't matter." Of course, I will probably just choose not to eat, which I have done many times, and people look at you really funny. I'd rather have NOTHING than to guess-timate calories and be wrong. And I'd rather look weird than gain weight. For me, eating out is not a temptation. I feel rotten when I eat out, so the suffering afterward is never worth the moments of deliciousness.
But that doesn't mean I don't WANT to enjoy it. I love it when someone else cooks the food and serves me. Nice.
And the cake...oh...the cake. I can make a mean cake. No mixes in this house. Homemade chocolate cake - three layers - peanut butter mousse between layers - chocolate ganache poured over the whole thing. Now THAT is something I cannot resist. I'm tempted just writing about it.
The words of my mother echo in the recesses of my mind...
"A moment on the lips, forever on the hips."
"A moment on the lips, forever on the hips."
"A moment on the lips, forever on the hips."
Oh, how true.
And, oh, how mad that makes me!
WHY? OH, WHY, MUST IT BE THIS WAY??????
I thought that writing this down would make today easier, but it has appeared to only bring that chocolate cake to the forefront of my mind, thus making me VERY hungry. Eggs and bacon aren't really sounding that good any more.
Somebody, please help me!!!!!!
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
What's Worse?
Thought for today:
Is it harder to prepare foods for others... hold, chop, stir, and smell
delicious foods YOU CAN'T HAVE???
Or is it harder to sit and watch others eating these things YOU CAN'T HAVE???
I can't decide.
But both options are ones I'd rather live without.
Dieting would be much easier if I lived alone on a deserted island.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Why is it so hard to get off and so easy to put on?
Yesterday, I weighed in at 1.5 pounds UP from last Sunday. Haven't even weighed today yet. Afraid to.
I have made it 20 days without cheating ONCE, drinking a HALF GALLON of water EVERY day, and exercising about 5 days a week. Enjoying my nordic poles. Had to splurge and get new sneakers and orthotics - feet hurting too much.
My sister-in-law is on the same warpath, struggling to beat the same enemy. Her daily battle gives me inspiration. Certainly no one in THIS house can relate in any way to what I am going through. It is hard to be alone in this fight. Knowing someone else is trying too makes it somehow easier and gives me more willpower to do it. Of course, she isn't hungry. I am hungry much of the time. I just think some people are that way. I eat high fiber, drink the water, etc., but it doesn't work. My mom says my dad was hungry all the time he dieted, which was for the last 20 plus years of his life. So maybe it's a gene. Anyway, the hunger makes this miserable.
And when I'm not hungry, I feel deprived. Don't get me wrong - I actually LOVE a plate of roasted veggies and turkey...or spicy black bean soup. My foods are delicious. Believe me, if I'm going to eat some calories, they better be good!!! So, it's not that the foods aren't good. It's just that they are not what I really want.
But what I really want will not leave me filled (as in full).
It's just that what I actually get to eat doesn't leave me fulfilled.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Supposed to be an "up" day, but...
January 1. The day of resolutions and hope.
But, for some reason, I feel discouraged today.
Maybe it's because of the reflection in the mirror. I can LOOK and instantly see that there
are excess pounds that need to come off. Even my face shows it. It's never been an "anorexic looking in the mirror and seeing what isn't there" with me. I KNOW it is what it is. And it's excess weight.
Did my BMI yesterday. Comes back "OBESE". Nice.
I can't wait for this weight to come off!!!!
I just hope what I am planning to do will actually work.
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